(God's column appears in this space every Friday.)

First off, I want to wish everyone a Happy Holiday season.

For those of you who think that I, before anyone else, ought to be wishing you a Merry Christmas, let me remind you that the Christians, Jews, Muslims, Zoroastrians, Buddhists, Hindi, and so on are ALL God's people. So Let's not leave anyone out.

Ultimately, of course, all the winter holidays are tied in some way to the notion of the Winter Solstice. In your Roman (solar) calendar, December 21st is the shortest day of the year-- the day when the sun, which had been disappearing a little bit each day since the summer, finally stops receeding and begins its return to prominence. Back when people lived their lives around the things that happened in the sky, this was an event of profound importance. There was a time when people had a legitimate fear that the days would just keep on getting shorter until the world was engulfed in the darkness. The collective memories of those times are burned into the fabric of humanity. And I should know, because I burned it.

If you look carefully in the bible, you will see that the boy was not born in the winter. He was born in early fall, shortly after the harvest, and well before the frost set in. The celebration of the "Christ Mass" was first held on December 25 by the church of Rome (in your fourth century) in order to make Christianity more palatable to the Pagans within the Roman empire, who already celebrated the birth of 'Invincible Sun' Mithras, the conqueror of darkness, on that date.

(Note to Self: send holiday card to Mithras...)

In the northern hemisphere, the time around December 21st has always been an especially sacred time, because the light begins to retake ground against the dark on that day. It is the darkest day of the year, the last day before the light begins to triumph again over dark. Hence the migration of holy days to that season. Even Christmas retains the imprint of the solstice.

As for the so-called "War on Christmas"-- why is it that the ones who presume to speak for Me in the loudest voices always bring the greatest shame unto Me? To act with such arrogance, belligerence, and spite toward other men and women, for no other reason than that they choose to wish you "happy holidays" is, in this season of profound joy and reflection, about as UN-Christlike as you can possibly be. Ignore these false prophets, for they be fools and worse. They speak not for Me.

Regardless of your faith, you all rejoice in the onset on the return of the light, at the time when the days are at their coldest and darkest, but the light continues to shine on, shine in the heavens, and if you know how to feel it, shines deep within each one of you. Hallelujah, peace on earth, good will toward men.

And Happy Holidays from the Man upstairs.